By Del Rey Honeycutt, Ph.D.
In today’s world of all information being at one’s fingertips, it is important to know that not everything one reads or sees is accurate. We have created a society that has run amok with various negative emotions and a tendency towards extremes: Anxiety, fear, anger, and depression exacerbated by comparison, isolation, loneliness, and – dare it be said – inaccurate self-diagnosing or pathologizing “normal” human experiences and expression based on a Google search or our favorite social media influencers. With mental health concerns continuously on the rise, regardless of reason, one thing can be certain – we must do a better job taking care of our mental health and building resilience.
Self-care has become one of those buzz words that may have some people rolling their eyes. It may be because some see it as unrealistic or have a belief that it only entails things that cost money, such as massages or vacations. However, self-care is so much more than that, and it is vital to our overall well-being.
Sometimes it is simply a matter of getting back to the basics – eating, exercise, sleep, and avoiding caffeine and alcohol in excess. It can be easy to pour a glass of wine at the end of a stressful day to unwind, but doing this regularly can be disruptive to sleep, and quality sleep is important for both our physical and mental health. Similarly, drinking more than one or two cups of coffee in the morning or having caffeine in the afternoon to overcome fatigue or tiredness from poor sleep leads not only to disrupted sleep, but also irritability, restlessness, and agitation. People can find themselves in this cycle, perpetuating stress and raising the potential for an inflammatory response in the body. To care for ourselves, we need to do our best to ensure that we are getting quality sleep. Additionally, we need to make healthy choices in what we eat (avoiding simple sugars and processed foods) and exercise regularly. Keeping ourselves active by walking, particularly in nature, doing yoga, Pilates, stretching, and strength training can do wonders for our minds and bodies.
One of the best ways to take care of self is to establish boundaries. Many people do not consider how their stress and other mental health concerns are related to unhealthy boundaries. People find themselves overcommitting or giving so much of their emotional and mental selves to others that they forgo doing the basics for self. It is okay and necessary to say “no” at times, particularly when you do not have the bandwidth to take on anything more without giving up a part of yourself. This may also mean taking a break from certain people. Letting go of the people-pleasing mentality and setting limits leaves us better able to manage or gauge what we have left to give or do for others.
It is easy in today’s society to always be plugged in; however, giving ourselves a break from the phone, text messages, emails, and social media allows us to recharge.
Consequently, not allowing for a break, particularly with the media, has jeopardized our mental health. It is important to pay close attention to the media we are consuming. For example, how much of the news are you consuming? Also, who do you follow on social media platforms? How long are you scrolling social media, reading or watching the news? We need to limit our engagement with media sources because it can increase negative feelings such as anxiety, fear, frustration, anger, and sadness. Find balance with limiting the number of hours you let yourself engage with the various platforms and sources, and for social media specifically, I recommend you follow people or pages that are positive, inspirational, or lead you to smile or laugh. This helps break up the content you see.
Other ways to take care of your mental health are to practice mindfulness or use guided meditation. Mindfulness is a practice of being in the present. For those new to mindfulness, consider breath-focused exercises. These exercises ask that you focus on breathing, whether it is counting breaths or using a specific breath-focused technique, and you do this on your own. An example of such a technique is as follows: Place a hand on your belly. Begin inhaling through your nose and feel your belly rise. When your belly is full, release your breath slowly by exhaling through the mouth (imagine blowing through a straw). Repeat until you notice a calmer mind and body. Guided meditation typically begins with focusing on your breath as well, but as in the name, someone guides it and the guide often asks you to visualize something, takes you on a journey, or tells a story. There are guided meditations to help people with various concerns (i.e., stress, sleep, anxiety, and depression). There are several apps available, but you can also find them by searching a platform such as YouTube.
Lastly, we are social beings, so relationships are important for our mental health. Being social is not everyone’s cup of tea, but having a few quality relationships is necessary. Make time to connect regularly with friends and family where there is a mutual respect and supportive relationship. Also, find hobbies that bring you peace or joy. Some of these hobbies may include community and a sense of belonging, which enhance our sense of well-being.
If you’d like to assess your overall well-being and find out what areas you may need to improve upon, there is a free quiz you can access*. Consider making a “toolbox” with about 10 strategies for self-care (i.e., write in my gratitude journal, dance like nobody is watching, play with my dog, talk to my best friend, meditate, exercise for 30 minutes), and commit to doing at least one every day.
*The author of this article has no affiliation with the Wheel of Wellbeing
Author’s biography
Del Rey Honeycutt, Ph.D. is a licensed mental health counselor in the state of New York and has been in the mental/behavioral health profession for more than 20 years. She has a doctorate in Health Psychology, which focuses on the relationship between mind, body, and behavior, and examines how behaviors, cognitions, and emotions influence mental and physical well-being. Dr. Honeycutt currently serves as the Director of Counseling at Alfred State College in Alfred, N.Y. She aims to promote holistic health, the understanding that one’s environment can either contribute positively or negatively to a person’s health outcomes. She can be reached at honeycdm@alfredstate.edu.
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